and sooo

....there is so much going on in my head right now that I fear what will happen if I start writing. I am not even sure it will make sense to anyone when written down for others to read. I just need to head to bed and let my dreams interupt my melancoly-ness.

let's just say that once in a blue moon I get "blue" over the simple yet oh so complex fact that I have 4 babies in heaven, 1 here with me and a future that is still so unclear.

off to bed.............or else pity will start to happen and I refuse to allow that negativity to set in.

and today...

is the last day of "freedom" that I have before.....

...i spend the next 3.5 years behind this desk studying. I have about a year before I will Lord willing get accepted into nursing school then a semester or 2 to finish the prereqs for that. Then 2 solid full time years of nursing school!

It's my newest endeavor and one that I am praying will get me closer to where He wants me.

I'm truly excited and a little (ok maybe a lot) nervous to be going back into school. It's been over 7 years since I set foot in a classroom and I was 23 at the time. Oh how this time will be soooo different!

But here is the desk when we first got it. Ugly handles and all. The little project was so fun!

thanks for stoppin by...and if I don't update for a long long while...its because I am sitting at my desk, studying!

weird wednesday

Today has been a weird day....and so, in continuing with the weirdness, I shall write random things.
1) I didn't win the bag. Lame.
2) I start school next tuesday!!! YIKES! I am getting nervous but oh so excited its annoying. Seriously. I think I'm annoying every one around me with my excitement. I think I need to stop writing about it right now due to my enthusiasm right now.....
3) How do you involve yourself but not to the point of annoying? And when does one cross the line to narcacism?
4) God works (as the clique saying goes) in mysterious ways and at times I am baffled at what in the world He is doing.
5) How can a person be a friend to someone who doesn't know what that means?
6) I need advice on how to wake up earlier when I am soooo used to sleeping in. I haven't had quiet time in too long to want to admit to and that needs to change. Like NOW
7) I am starting a book club that i am totally excited about.
8) My semester includes but is not limited to...planning 3 parties including a 5 year old bday party, a Sip-n-see for my bestie and a coming home party for my one of my other friends. OH and did I mention that happens in a one week time frame? I also am involved in the planning of my sister's wedding scheduled for early August. Matron of honor sounds so OLD! Also, being involved in my other bestie's wedding and all that that entails being a bridesmaid adds more to the days. I'm super excited about it all....but looking at it like that is a bit daunting.
9) Would you do something if it meant for certain there would be hurt feelings involved?
10) I need quiet time now more than ever. Lord be with me...my undeserving soul.

this turned into a really weird jumbled up bunch of statements and questions

thus is my life these days.

and what happened to the spell check button??

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Ok so its a little bit after the day but wishes are sent your way anyways!

Its been a super busy year already. Fun but busy.

New Year's Eve was a blast! We went out to eat with my friends and Chris actually got to go! But he had to leave before dinner was even over because he had to go to work... :o( Then after dinner we spent time at a friends house talking and playing games til the ball dropped! It was fun.

New Year's day was spent traveling to Houston for my nephew's first birthday party!!! My little traveler did fantastic and we had a blast getting there. While there we totally enjoyed visiting with family and getting to see my nephew.

We then headed back home and had a great time traveling again! Katelyn does such a great job driving. Although she does ask many time when we will get there, she never complains and is super easy going. She is true joy to drive with.

That was this weekend...just a few days ago! Wow! It seems so long ago!! Ha!

K went back to school Tuesday and was totally wiped all day today. But she sure does love school.

Speaking of, I start school on the 19th! Ahhh! I am totally excited and ready for the challenge. Chris and I are busy redoing a FREE desk we just got. We spent all last night sanding it and the drawers and today we went to Lowe.s and got all the supplies to paint it, add new fictures and put a glass top in. It is going to look awesome! I will post before and after pictures once we are finished. It is going to look aweosome! Perfect size for computer, work and books. Totally blessed by this little desk!

I am also doing a online book club. SUPER excited about it. Just click on the BLOOM square on the top of my blog and you can find out all about it.

Well, I am off to do some more voting :o)!!! I am entered in a New Year's resolution contest. SO GO VOTE FOR ME!!!

#31

http://www.infulsight.com/kmooreblog/?p=38

Scroll down to the number 31 and vote and vote and vote and vote and vote!!

And vote some more!! Vote for 31 until noon today! Vote vote vote!! I really want to win. Hehehe!

Pictures of all sorts of stuff to come shortly!

VOTE! :o)

Today

...was a great day!

~Wake up with the hubby fast asleep on one side of me and my sweet little girl snoozin on the other side of me! COZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZYYYYYY sandwich! After K wakes up, she runs out of bed. A minute or so later she comes running back into the room to tell me that Santa ate all the cookies AND drank the milk! PLUS the reindeer ate the reindeer food on the porch and "they were messy!" It was the cutest thing to see her face light up so much.

~open up presents and stockings and swim in a sea of wrapping paper with the girl!

~Eat a small snack while singing Happy Birthday to Jesus as we listen to Christmas music.

~Get dressed and head over to the parents house for a yummy traditional coffee cake breakfast with other delicious mom made foods. PLUS I got to try out a fantastic Blueberry Coffee Cake recipe I got from Monica. You should check her out...she makes soooo many amazing yummies! Thanks Monica! It was a hit! :o)

~Play Guess.tures with the family and kick some royal booty with me and my ma on the same team! It's like we have a 6th sense or something! hehehe!

~Hang out some more then play Cran.ium where again...our team kicks some booty! But not by much! It was fun and hilarious!

~Sit and chat with mom while she fixes some delicious chicken salad and grilled cheese. Clean up the kitchen and house then say our goodbyes because my sweet hoosband has to work tonight and we needed to get him home to change and get ready.

So here I am at home, sitting once again on the couch with my lap top and tv with my sweet little spoiled beyond belief little girl. Happy as a clam that today she wore herself out. Her words not mine. And as we prayed our prayers goodnight, we thanked Jesus for all that He does and once again wished him a wonderful birthday. And Katelyn even hugged Jesus goodnight. :o)

Thank you God for the amazing Gift of our Lord and Savior. Happy Birthday Jesus!! We loooooooveee You!!!!

Am I enough

I was sitting on the couch earlier today checkin my facebook (on my new and wonderful laptop!!) with Katelyn playing on the coffee table with her small animals. She loves animals! She is so cute makin them talk and have personalities and everything. Super cute!

I had been watching TLC mornings where there are baby stories, adoption stories etc. and just had it on in the back round at this point. The show playing was Adoption Story. This particular story was a family who had 2 special needs kids they had adopted and were wanting more....there's more to the story but I wasn't really watching. The couple were talking about how they weren't satisfied with just one child; they wanted more. They would be happy with more children.

As I was sitting on the couch, Katelyn being all cute with her little animals turns around ever so sweetly and asks me, "Are you a happy with just one"?

Stop me cold in my tracks.

My precious sweet miracle asking me is she was enough. If just her, my only one was good enough. I don't think she will ever know just how happy I am with "just one".

I am so thankful for the journey I have been on with all the pregnancy loss/miscarriage. It has changed me forever and brought me even closer to my Lord and Savior and for that, how could I not rejoice? I am also thankful that I have not been one to overly dwell on the loss. I am thankful that my outlook has been one of love and learning instead of pity and "whoa is me". I don't dwell on the if I am to have another child and we are content being where we are right now. It hasn't been an easy journey I'll admit, but today, this day and for the few previous years I am more than happy with our "just one". I am nlot saying this to be prideful. I say this because it hit me like a ton of bricks. My happyness with "just one" not only affects me and my husband, but Katelyn is profoundly affected by our situation as well. It was today that realized just how amazing all of this is. And today, when my one was asking if she was good enough, I got to honestly answer, "I am more than happy with just one." And I meant it with all of my heart.

I'm a little bit humbled by such an innocent little (gigantic) question.

Honesty

Well, I deleted my last post because well, I am not quite sure. Just did.

But the jest of the situation is, I get addicted to exercise and not for exercise sake. For the mirror's sake and how it makes me look after running and exercising. So, in all my seeking to be a better person in God's eyes, I have asked Him to direct my exercise and I have asked Him to be the judge on what the mirror says or does not truly say to me. I've never been one to think too highly of myself or my appearance so for now, I just want to see myself the way God sees me. We're still workin on it! One day I hope to. One day.

For now, my first step is to exercise. Exercise so that I can be healthy. Exercise so that I can enjoy working my body the way it was intended...cause Lord knows I LOVE to run and my body seems to know what its doin. (thanks daddy for these skoootin legs!) I am excited to be running again and I look forward to my new journey!!

So now that that's all said...I went running tonight with the girls! Super fun!! I have forgotten how fun it is to run with someone and actually TALK!! I love my quiet time with God and my music but a running partner adds so much to my run. And we did pretty good for our first run. It wasn't too too cold either. We are planning to meet up once a week and run together and run the other times at home. I am looking forward to our weekly runs and fellowship with the girls!

Now, we just need to find a 5k that is in the near future....any ideas anyone? And come join us!!!