two days ago we started cleaning out our house. sorting through all the cabinets in the kitchen, the junk drawers in the entertainment center and well, that's about as far as we've gotten. but BOY have we gotten rid of a ton of junk! I'm finding this cleanse very therapeutic. like i said in an earlier post, things around here are changing. almost 8 years of collecting things that don't matter and holding on to things that at the time gave us comfort. well, these things are no longer needed. right now, all we need is a fresh start. a start that allows us to be as free and clear as we need to be with reminders of yesteryears gone.
therapy.
yes. its been like therapy for me. cleaning out the few drawers and cabinets that i have so far has spurred many memories that i had not thought about in years....it has made me throw stuff away that had i not gotten to the place in my life that these last almost 8 years have gotten me to, i would have still shoved that thing back into that drawer only to continue to clutter things. clutter......that's how i have felt about my life. i loathe clutter. i loathe disorganization. its breeds choas and confusion and that has no place in my life right now. i want to organize and minimize. i'm afraid that during all this organizationfest, the container store will love me so much they keep the store open once a week just for me. :-) but that's comforting to me right now. i'm excited about cleaning out things because in the process, i feel like i'm cleaning out my life and that's a great feeling.
and because of this, i made a huge decision today. i took my pregnancy bible (yes its called that), my baby name book, and my what to expect during the first year book and put it in the garage sale pile. along with, all my maternity clothes. i didn't cry. i didn't really dwell. just decided that you know what, its time to move on. After years of not using birth control and spending way too much money and tears on negative pregnancy tests, i HAVE decided to move on. i've decided that its time to quit holding on to the past life that i've tried so hard to hold on to. honestly, it was a life i longed for that never came to fruition. nonetheless, as long as i hold on to that life, God can't move me into THIS life. the life He's been pruning me, us for. THIS life is just beginning and the past is just that....past.
so no tears. no sorrow.
just, happy.
now on to more cleaning out....thanks for stoppin by!
4 years ago
3 comments:
Just Happy...I love!! We can be organized and happy together!! Can't wait to see you...
Congrats to you for taking the plunge. We have tried to start cleaning out stuff also, but so far it fizzles out after a little while. I get easily distracted finding the little things and always end up doing something else. :) I'm sure that we need to work on Kylie's room. That girl has so much stuff that she doesn't play with, it's a crime that we don't donate it or something.
I have much admiration for you dearest of daughters. You have been through so much. More than I ever have in some areas. But you are made of special stuff from heaven. You are such a gift and blessing...I'm excited for your new start. Love you beps.
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